Amor y otras cosas: Why Does Infidelity Exist in a Happy Couple?

José Luis López Velarde shares with you why infidelity exists in a happy couple.

Infidelity is never an easy topic to discuss, but it is necessary to be able to confront it.

What’s really important is your happiness and that you can overcome this if it happens in the relationship.

Infidelities are often one of the most common causes of breakups, but is it really necessary for them to occur in a happy relationship?

Why is there infidelity in a happy relationship? The relationship was in good shape. They had good communication, enjoyed their time together, and had built a home and a family.

They had plans for the future. And yet, infidelity occurred. What happened? In a relationship, the balance between conflict and harmony is fundamental.

This balance allows you to step out of your comfort zone at times and, at others, to feel secure and loved. I am José Luis López Velarde, and today we will talk about infidelity and some reasons why it occurs.

Types of Infidelity

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Infidelity Resulting from Relationship Problems: In this case, infidelity is the result of an unusual dynamic in the relationship.

Everything starts well, they make monogamy agreements or establish some type of agreement, but the dynamic is broken.

One of the two accumulates anxiety, resentment, or other conflicts and finds it less catastrophic to seek infidelity than to address the original problem.

This infidelity arises due to a lack of communication and negotiation in the couple.

Infidelity due to Personal Situations

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Now let’s talk about infidelity as a result of individual emotional management.

The other form of infidelity arises due to the internal emotional management of one of the individuals in the relationship.

It can be due to anxiety, lack of skills to deal with emotions, or simply a need for emotional or physical exploration.

This infidelity is not necessarily related to the couple’s problems but to the individual’s personal issues.

Balance in a Happy Relationship

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In a truly happy relationship, it’s important to maintain a balance between happy moments and some conflicts.

If a relationship lacks problems and seems perfect, it could be an indication that problems are accumulating under the surface.

Balance is key to maintaining a healthy and lasting relationship. If you find no problems in your relationship and believe that the problems that arise are insignificant, it is possible that underlying issues are being ignored.

A relationship must have a balance, with 60-70% happy moments and 30-40% conflicts, to be healthy.

Infidelity in a Happy Relationship

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If your relationship is or has been genuinely happy but has experienced cheating, it is important to consider whether the infidelity has served as a mechanism to maintain the bond.

Although it is not the norm, in some cases, infidelity can release tension and emotional conflict, helping the relationship continue to function.

However, it is essential to communicate with your partner and consider if it is possible to redefine the agreements of the relationship.

What weighs more in your relationship, the events of infidelity or the years of happiness together? It is crucial to find new agreements if you decide to move forward with the relationship.

The Grieving Process

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When you discover infidelity in a happy relationship, it is important to remember that you will go through a grieving process that consists of five stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.

Sharing the infidelity with third parties during the anger stage can lead to judgments and unnecessary complications.

It is essential to keep the information between you, your partner, and therapy professionals who can help you navigate this situation.

Ultimately, infidelity in a happy relationship is not necessarily the end. It can be an opportunity to reevaluate and adjust the agreements in the couple.

Your Recovery

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The key is open communication, understanding, and the willingness to find solutions that work for both. Emotional resilience and time are important allies in this process.

Remember that there is no single answer or predetermined path to overcome infidelity in a happy relationship.

Each couple is unique and must find their own way to healing and renewing their relationship.

Continue to seek information and support, and realize that you have the power to make decisions that benefit your relationship and your emotional well-being. I am José Luis López Velarde, and I bid you farewell for now. Thank you for your attention!